Order in the Court

"Judge Mathis". Hands down, the best thing on TV. Who knew a case involving two cousins fighting over a can of curl activator could be so entertaining?

Lesson learned: "It's time for hard lessons and tough love."

It Takes Two

I always knew my dad was the smartest in the world. I agree with Obi-Wan Kenobi when they say that their dad was the best at Algebra homework. Mine was too. My dad and I had a special connection. My mother was a teacher and you would think that I would ask my mom for help on homework but I would always rather ask my dad to help me. He had a way about him that made me understand and not shut down. Now, the real question is when did I realize that my mother knew what she was talking about? Not until I gave birth to my first child. The minute I held my son in my arms was when I finally understood my mother.

Lesson Learned: Mom knows what she is talking about too. Sometimes it helps to listen to her.

Submitted by: VA Friend

Obi-Wan Kenobi

I've always known that my daddy knows everything and everyone. You can ask him any question and he's got an answer. He can be in any state and someone will come up to him with a big smile saying how long its been since they've seen one another. I can call out any address and he can tell me what side of the street its on and usually what's next door. My daddy is so smart that my 8th grade algebra homework looked like a mathematician's Ph.d dissertation because he couldn't understand why he got the answer so easily.

Lesson Learned: No matter how many degrees I have. No matter how much I think I know. I'll never know as much as my daddy.

Submitted by: Nicole

Been There, Done That

Last year for my grandmother's 95th birthday, my sister put together a slideshow of a bunch of old family pics. Alot of the pics I had never seen before, and a bunch of them included pics of my Dad back in the day. He looked JUST like me! He had the same dusty clothes, scrawny legs and goofy smilie like I had as a kid. And he had the same broad shoulders, groomed goatee and subtle confidence that I've developed as a young man. After seeing those pics I had a true revelation: there is nothing I have done (or hope to do) that my Dad hasn't already done. As cool and as current as I think I am, my Dad was just as cool and just as current in his day. And I have the pics to prove it!

Lesson learned: I'm proud to be my Dad's "mini-me".

Respect Your Elders

It officially hit me that I was grown up the first time somebody younger than me called me "Sir". I was all of 30 years old!

Submitted by: CKC Sr.

Shades of Gray

I remember it well. I had just turn 28, and still felt like a 19 year old. It was one night at around 10pm. I was in front of my bathroom mirror putting the final touches to my make up and hoochie outfit, getting ready for a night of clubbing. Then, right there, on the right upper part of my scalp, I saw it. A gray hair! I stared at it for a few seconds, then grabbed it and pulled it gently--to make sure it was attached to my scalp. It was. For some reason at that moment I realized that my days of spoiled, carefree young woman were over and adulthood was just around the corner.

Submitted by: Maribel

Eye Blink

I officially became "grown up" when I came to understand mortality, and the fact that life is temporary.

Submitted by: Teran

Bare Necessities

It hit me that I have officially "grown up" when I started drinking coffee every day and started buying anti-aging and firming lotions (as a preventative measure, of course!).

Submitted by: Desiree

Hallmark Moment

I'll never forget it. It was back in '03. I was 26 years old, and my cousin was graduating from UC Berkeley. I was in my parents hotel room, looking through their bags. My mom asked, "What are you looking for?" I said, "I'm looking for Terry's graduation card, I still need to sign my name." My mom said, "Oh, I'm sorry baby. Your dad and I already signed and mailed him his card. We figured you'd go ahead and get him something on your own."

Get a card on my own?? Huh?

Lesson learned: You know you're grown up when you have to buy your own greeting cards.

The Abilene Paradox

Most often your first instinct or intuition about something or someone is right. Yet, although we know that something or someone is not right for us, we go ahead and do it, or enter into a relationship anyway. Why do we do that? Why do we go against our basic intincts? In one of my college business classes this was called the 'Abilene Paradox'.

A couple was enjoying a relaxing hot afternoon on the front porch of their farm house playing cards with his parents. They had a big pitcher of leomonade and everything was cool. Then someone mentioned that maybe they should drive into Abilene(Texas), some 25 miles away, for ice cream. None of the four really wanted to do it, but each said they would go along if the group really wanted to. The next thing they knew they had piled into their car and were off to Abilene for ice cream. On the way back the car air conditioner went out, the car over-heated forcing them to pull over on the side of the highway and stand in the blazing sun for several hours while the car cooled down. When they finally got back to the house they were miserable, irratated at each other, thirsty, and exhausted. They had allowed themselves to do something that initially nobody wanted to do. They had left the comfort of the porch and turned it into disaster.

The moral of the story is to follow your first instinct. Chances are you were right.

Submitted by: CKC (Sr.)

Perfect Storm

Recently, I was dating a girl that I became totally in love with. The kind of love that when you saw her and were next to her, a feeling of euphoria and contentment swept over your body. After dating for a while, I realized that this gift of love that stems from the heart wasn't enough to calm the raging waters that came between us. I've heard love conquers all and I tried to do all I could to make things work. It came to a point when I had to use my head to pull my unwilling heart and my body out of this tornado of negativity.

Submitted by: SIAKA

Alright Hans Solo this ones for you...

Over the years I have been blessed to be in the presence of and have dated many women. Now my first statement may sound like I'm bragging but to me its just an honest comment. Myself I was called ugly alot growing up. Over the years my body has change, my mind has become stronger and I am at peace. All in all I guess these qualities have made me more attractive to women. So like most young ugly kids I have dated the women who years past would not have given me the time of day if they had on five watches and I was blind. What this leads me to is that no matter how pretty they are the ugly little boy in me always brings me back to my center. And when I come to center many things that look pretty become ugly or at least dull. Now that my ego is calming down I look at models and such type women like damn I bet your giving someone hell, and he don't even know that he's taking it all because of your looks.

Submitted by: Anonymous

Love on a 2-way street

I dated this girl back in the day who was really pretty. Runway model pretty. But she wasn't that smart. OK, maybe that's not fair. Let's just say mental stimulation was one of her least favorite activities. But hey, nobody's perfect, right? We dated for a while. Then one day during a conversation she said, "All I wanna do is stay home and have your babies." I knew right then and there it wasn't gonna last.

Lesson learned: Thankfully my heart realizes that my brain needs a little lovin' too.

Field Day

I am a teacher in a Juvenile Detention Center. The other day I was announcing that we would be having a 'field day' next week and I was reading the menu for that day which is a special menu from our normal 'jail food'. One kid said, "ah, man! I am being released two days before field day. Can I come back for a visit and hang out with you all?" I said, "No you can't just come visit." Another kid chimed in with all seriousness in his voice. "Okay, here's whatcha do. Go down to Dollar General and steal a toothbrush in plain sight of the manager. You will get arrested but don't worry it is only petit larceny and you won't be in here for long but you will be back in time for field day."

Lesson Learned: One man's jail cell is another man's castle.

Submitted by: VAfriend

Thank you, Trainman

Was running late yesterday (as usual). I hurried down the steps to catch the waiting 6 train. As I arrived, the doors closed. In frustration, I pounded on the doors.

Much to my surprise, the doors opened back up! Stunned, I looked both ways -- and caught sight of the trainman. He gave me a wink, just before I scurried into the train.

Lesson 1: There are nice New Yorkers.

Lesson 2: It's not just hot women who get winks; scrawny Jewish guys with big hair can get them too.

Lesson 3: Don't be afraid to bang on the doors.

Submitted by: JG

May 23rd

I turn 30 years old today. This morning I had to trod up 5 steep Seattle city blocks and thought I would never make it. I had one drink last night and today I feel hung over. I think I might have found a gray hair last week. And the other day I returned a skirt I had just bought at Nordstrom because the reality is, I can't wear skirts like that anymore-- it's just not appropriate for someone my age.

10 years ago I was 20 years old and in college. I was partying, studying for tests, wearing 20- year-old clothes and making all kinds of stupid mistakes. You know what? It was fun then, but today is beautiful. I've learned and grown from my mistakes, I have a career I am proud of, a wonderful partner, a mother I adore and my friends are my family. I've had a wonderful life, and I'm looking forward to the next 30 years!

Lesson learned: 30 ain't no big thing!

Submitted by: Claudia

Work it, Girl

Every job I ever had I did exactly what I was told. Got there when they told me, left when they told me, ate when they told me. One day I went to lunch at 2p. When I got back at 3p my boss said, "You need to take lunch at 12p. You can't be out of the office all day." That's dumb I thought. I didn't start until 10a. Why would I take lunch 2 hours later? Whatever, I didn't argue. I did what I was told. I never got promoted and 2 years before I left they stopped giving raises - of any kind. After 7 years at that job I decided enough was enough.

I made a decision. My next job was going to work for me not the other way around. I walked in to the interview asked for exactly the amount of money I wanted. Told them I was not a morning person and couldn't possibly be at work before 9am. I even named my own title. And you know what, they agreed.

Needless to say I hated the job and left after 6 months. However, I decided from that point on that if I had to spend 9 hours at a job I should at least get some of my own terms in return. Because I'm a great catch and I'm worth it!

Lesson Learned: Work the job don't let it work you.

Submitted by: Nicole

The rule is still golden

I was in a meeting this past week with a colleague. He made a comment during our conversation that really stuck with me. We were talking about what it takes to motivate people, and he said, "In business, people are only motivated by two things: your attituide and your money". I didn't want to agree with him, because on the surface it sounded like such a "capitalist" statement. But the more I thought about it, the more I had to agree. Just like anything else, your attitude and your money are a reflection of yourself. Having one or the other is OK. But its what you do with them that makes all the difference.

Lesson learned: Treat people the way you want to be treated, and pay people the way you want to be paid.

Purple Rain

In the 9th grade, my then best friend Angela got me tickets to the Purple Rain concert for my birthday. My parents decided that, although they knew I loved Prince more than life itself, he was too risque for a 14 year old to see live. I was devastated, heart broken, crushed. I thought I would never recover from the pain.

To this day I remember the anguish that I felt when Angela and Andrea (who she took to the concert instead of me) brought me a t-shirt the day after the show. I recently told my mother that she stunted my growth, ruined my life and that the decision she made to keep me away from Prince was the worst thing that has ever happened to me in my whole life.

Her response: If that's the worst thing that's ever happened to you then you've had a pretty good life. Lesson Learned.

Submitted by: Nicole

"Patches"

When I was kid I used to play so hard on the playground that I constantly wore holes into the knees of all my pants. My mom got so tired of it that she started sewing industrial strength knee patches on my pants. The problem was, she never used patches that matched my pants! Gray patches on black pants. Brown patches on green pants. I walked around all day looking like a baseball catcher. It got so bad that kids at school started calling me "patches". But I didn't care, I kept right on playing.

Lesson learned: No price is too great as long as you're doing what you love.